Monday, November 30, 2009

Bows to the Chocolate Gods - Review Baker's Dipping Chocolate

The Gods have heard my call!!!

Baker's Dipping Chocolate is totally awesome for the non-cook.  Its so very simple to do.  You place it in the microwave and every 30 seconds you stir it.  You do this over and over until the chocolate has melted.  Then you dip whatever you want into it.. I've tried apples, strawberries and now pretzels.  This is a great thing to have right before Christmas. 

Yes I'm sure that most of you are aware of it but I wasn't.  My house will always have dipping chocolate now.  Oh man this is good!!!

Note:  This is strictly my opinion.  I was not paid for it.  I simply bought it and fell in love with it.  I had to share with the blogging hemosphere.


Sunday Stealing on Monday

This post is Lee's fault at Headaches, Hot Flashes and Hormones.  I loved her Stealing Sunday so I'm stealing it on Monday.  I am so far behind.  First off, I love the Sunday Stealing normally.  Though I haven't been able to contribute.  I think I'm simply going insane sometimes. 

Yesterday Sunday Stealing ripped this meme off a blogger named Vicki at the blog Fleurette. She states that she found it at Deborah's Devil's Sidekick blog. But, it was probably stolen there as well. So, of course, that will be as far as we go. Tracing back our theft's thieves might take some time. Link back to us at Sunday Stealing!

Cheers to all us thieves!

Sunday Stealing: The Tell Me About Yourself Meme

  1. When is your birthday? May 2, 196? lol not giving year
  2. Where were you born? In a hospital after my mom fought my dad to have me there.  He didn't want to quit watching some cowboy movie.  Ok just how screwed up does that make me at birth?  Well no wonder I'm an oddball.
  3. Where do you live now? In a house with 2 kids, a husband, 2 dogs and a cat.  I think that means I'm moving to the loony bin soon.
  4. What is your heritage? Well it's the same as my parents.  Wait wait.. Mom, did you finish the family tree yet?  I've been waiting years for that now.  It's all on separate papers in different places.  Ok now you know why I'm disorganized.
  5. Tell us about a weakness. Oh I do not like this question.  A weakness would have to be for my child.  I tend to want to give them everything.  Ok well that's a little normal so.  Like Lee, I have a bad back... Oh baby I follow the queen on that one.  That's kinda normal too.  Most of us have bad backs now.  Let's see what else, I have a weakness for chocolate.  I want it.. I need it.  I gotta have it.  Ok that equal weakness.
  6. What's a goal that you'd like to achieve? Queen's response:  DUH! Blog Domination!  Amen I have to follow the Queen on this one too.
  7. What is the most overused internet phrase? Queen's response:  LOL... Darn the queen is good.  That's my pick too.
  8. What was your first thought this morning? Oh no I have to get up
  9. When do you usually go to bed? When I'm tired usually.
  10. Do you smoke? If not, did you ever? No
  11. Do you like your current relationship status?  I love my husband.  I love being his wife.  I don't always love everything though.
  12. Do you (or did you) get along with your parents? Sometimes
  13. How often do you drink alcohol? I need something now after this survey.  I only got half of it from Google Reader.  Went to comment on Lee's and sheesh there were more questions.
  14. Have you ever tried drugs (that weren't prescribed)? ummm.. I don't remember
  15. Have you ever gone skinny dipping? If yes, do tell.  Yes haven't we all?  We were on a houseboat trip and I don't want to know if the rest of the couples knew.  Thank you very much.
  16. If given the choice, how would you like to die? Not knowing
  17. What did you want to be when you grew up? I wanted to be ME.
  18. Have you ever been dumped? I always dump the trash sheesh
  19. What's on your pizza? Wait wait you didn't tell me to order a pizza first.  Hand it over now.  Pepperoni please.
  20. Have you ever shoplifted? No my brother did once.  His punishment was enough to scare me to death.
Now make sure that you check out other Sunday Stealing.  And hurry over to the Headaches, Hotflashes and Hormones.

Looks back in...What are you doing here still??  Go check out Queen Lee.


Sunday, November 29, 2009


So my friend blueviolet over at A Nut in a Nutshell answered some questions on her blog awhile ago.  I decided to do the same questions.  Please be sure to check her out.

You're kind of crazy with your commenting. What gives?

I love love to read other blogs but I'm so far behind right now.  I am trying to catch up I promise.  But it seems that I keep falling behind no matter how I try.

I was trying to keep up with all of my followers blogs.  But honestly its impossible.

So following blueviolet's example, I am now using Google Reader to do the following:

I have a folder of Must Read blogs in my google reader. Once I find that I'm visiting a blog frequently, it goes in that folder.

My friends are automatically put in there.  I'm always looking for new and fun blogs to read.  Keep my funny I'm gonna follow you.

If you follow me, if you make comments on my blog.  I will follow you as well.  I love to visit the people that comment on my posts.  I love to learn more about my readers.  I love to share with you.

I am trying to read my Must Reads every day.  Now since I just started google reader, I have like a 1000 posts that show as new.  I'm doing my best to catch up with everyone.  I was behind before but I didn't know it was that much. 

If I find that I am leaving comments and never getting answers back... I will stop commenting.  Just like blueviolet, I don't like one-sided friendships. 

So if you are following me, expect that I am now a stalker of yours.  Ok ok I'm a friendly stalker.

Do you respond to every comment you receive?

A lot of times I answer your comments by email but sometimes I do it by stopping in at your blog.  I'm just finding it so consuming sometimes.  If you take the time to write a nice comment, I'm going to respond more than likely by email.  Please be patient though.  I do get behind.

I hate your giveaways. Why do you do them?

Well I have only done one of them.  I really liked it.  I expect that I will do more if... big if.. I can get sponsors.  If you want me to do a giveaway, please be sure to contact me.

How come you never post your awards?

So this question really doesn't apply to me.  I try to post all my awards.  I try to award them according to the rules.  I, also, try to never give an award out twice to the same person.  I simply love acknowledging my wonderful blogger friends and the new blogs I found. 

And another question of my own:  Will you being doing reviews in the future?

Yes, I plan on doing reviews in the future but I will always have a blog about something else on those days as well.  I don't want to become just one thing or another.

I love talking about my kids.  I love pictures.  I love sharing moments.  I love sharing things that I have experienced or will.  I love sharing my family's story.  But most of all, I love that you enjoy reading my blog.

I love you guys..  Now stop over and check out blueviolet.  You will appreciate her I promise.  She's great.

PR NOTE:  If you are interested in me doing a review or giveaway for you, please contact me at  Thanks so much.


Saturday, November 28, 2009

Party on Midday Escapades

Midday Escapades is having a great giveaway ending November 30, 2009.  Do you have a party coming up that you need invitations for or announcements sent out? Do you know someone who is having a birthday party, baby or bridal showers? Then make sure to enter the giveaway here.

Honestly I don't know why I'm sharing this with you.  I want to win this giveaway myself.  PurpleTrail is generously giving away a Yearly Membership for its basic online service so you can get started right away on sending out your holiday party invites and announcements.  I found out that you can do them online and print them at home with no problems.  WOW I want to win.  But I want to give you a chance to win as well.

You can, also, even get a discount right now of 25% on the NEW PurpleTrail Print where they will print and ship your customized designs directly to you.  Just use code "pttwtrfrnds" to get your discount.

Enter the giveaway here.

Good luck to all.


Friday, November 27, 2009

Watch 101 Christmas Classics Online

Awesome site I wanted to share is On it, you will find 101 Christmas Classics which you can watch online. Now I was trying to figure out what time my local cartoons would be on. I would hate the kids to miss them. Now I don't have to worry about it. I can show them anytime I want. So check it out. I think there is something for everyone. Well maybe not if you are Scrooge. Oh wait he's on there too.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving to All

Happy Thanksgiving to all.  May you have a wonderful day with your family and friends.  Today is a day for being thanksful for everything that you have.

Here are the top ten things that I am thankful for:
  1. I'm thankful for my life
  2. I'm thankful for my husband, kids, and pets.  I thank God every day that we were able to add Jason to the family.
  3. I'm thankful that my parents are still alive and well.
  4. I'm thankful for my brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews and Ken's relatives.
  5. I'm thankful for all the things that it takes to make us comfortable in our house like the furnace, running water, electricity, phone, cable and etc.
  6. I'm thankful for the food that we have.
  7. I'm thankful for my friends whether online or off.
  8. I'm thankful for my husband's job.
  9. I'm thankful for my sight, hearing, smell, etc.
  10. I'm thankful for being able to have the time to fix things, to make new things, or whatever else I need it for.


Thanksgiving Wishes

May your stuffing be tasty

May your turkey plump,

May your potatoes and gravy

Have never a lump.

May your yams be delicious

And your pies take the prize,

And may your Thanksgiving dinner

Stay off your thighs!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

No Words Necessary - Wordless Wednesday

Gone visiting...Enjoy

Classic Funny

You know those moments when you or your spouse does something so goofy that you both laugh and every time you look at each other or think about it you giggle or burst out laughing. Well, this is one of those moments. Ok, so my husband and I had taken the kids to the YMCA and one of my daughter's friends went with us. So we went to drop her off on the way home. We're driving through her neighborhood, commenting on the Christmas lights here and there. Now, mind you I've been to her house before but my husband hasn't. We are about to get to her house and my husband says, "Wow, look at the crappy lights on that one, They shouldn't have bothered." I said out of the side of my mouth, "Um, honey... that's her house." So his great attempt at covering it up was this, "Um, well I mean it looks great. really it looks... Ok I'm shutting up now." Well after the awkwardness of her getting out and saying thanks and good bye, we pulled away and it was real quiet. Then we all burst out laughing in a roar. I'm still giggling about it today. Friggen Classic!!!!!- written by a friend..I had to share

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Tuesday's Post It

Upon popular request, I am again joining Supahmommy with Post It Tuesday. Each post means something to me. Mostly likely it will reference something that happened this week. So on with the Post-Its.


Magical Moments on Tuesday


It's time for Magical Moment on Tuesday for HeartsMakeFamilies! For those of you visiting for the first time, the goal is to talk about one thing during the week that was magical to you. I mean that you were over the top about. It could be a project you completed, something your child did, a grand new idea, something you saw, etc. Something that was so magical that you have to tell us about it. I know. I know. This is why we all have blogs. But sometimes we just write about the negative things because we had a bad week. So if we all write about a Magical Moment then we might uplift another blogger. This is the very reason that I have this blog so that one day my children can see. You do not have to be a mom to do this. To join us, on Tuesday post what your Magical Moment was (add my button from the right side bar or link to me) and then be sure to stop here to link up and meet other moms at HeartsMakeFamilies to see what their Magical Moment was.

This week my Magical Moment was with the furnace man.  NO! NO! Before you think it, I did not cheat on my husband nor would I ever think about it.  I've been married a long time now.  But you see the furnace man told me that the motor burned up in the furnace.  (OR Something like that which involved the fan.  I am so not technical.)  Anyway this meant that it was not going to cost me $3,000 to $5,000.  It was going to cost me $250.  Yes this was magical because I had no clue where I would get $3,000 to $5,000.  I was worried about my kids having a Christmas.  I was worried about the roof over my head.  So whether it is magical to most.  This was my magical moment for the week.  I think I felt the stress literally leaving my body.

Now it is your turn. Please post about what your Magical Moment was (add my button from the right side bar or link to me) and then be sure to stop here to link up and meet other moms at HeartsMakeFamilies to see what their Magical Moment was.


Monday, November 23, 2009

How to Help Others During The Holidays

I used to be a member of the Jaycees (Junior Chamber of Commerce) which is a group of young people between the ages of 18 and 41. This group gives young people the tools they need to build the bridges of success for themselves in the areas of business development, management skills, individual training, community service, and international connections.

With the focus of the nation on volunteerism, from the smallest towns to the largest cities, the Jaycees are enlarging areas of opportunity for young people. To learn more about getting involved with this unique organization contact the National Service Center at: 1.800.JAYCEES.

Times are really tough right now for most people. Here are some ways that you can help out your community.

  1. Donate Food - Most schools, churches and stores are having food drives right now. I know that the economy is hard. I know that money is tight for most of us. But even I can donate one can of food to a food drive. Even that will give you a holiday thrill.
  2. Donate Your Time - Help out in a homeless shelter, hospitals, food pantry, school, etc. Join a group like Jaycees that volunteers so that you can find all those places that need help.
  3. Clean Out Your Closets and Donate What You Don't Need - I have tons of stuff in my closets that I don't touch. You can donate it to Salvation Army, churches, schools, and so many other places. They are always looking for household items, clothing, toys, and various other things.
  4. Shovel your older neighbor’s driveway and sidewalks – Bring a smile to your community senior citizens by shoveling their sidewalks and driveways. Most of them are living on a fixed budget. They can’t afford to pay someone. The simple act of you doing this may allow them to get out of the house. It can be hard for them to walk around it.
  5. Donate furniture – Do you have an old table, lamp, couch that you don’t use? Donate it to your local Amvets.
  6. Make a food basket and leave it on the steps of someone’s door – This is an old favorite of mine. You make a food basket and leave it on someone’s steps that you know is going through a hard time.
When you give of yourself and your time, you give so much back to the community and at the same time receive so much reward for your volunteer work. Give it a try it is guaranteed to put a smile on your face and a happy, warm feeling in your heart!


Please God Give Me Patience of a Saint

Please please God give me the patience of a saint! Today is one of my normal days with Jason but the furnace isn't running. My freaking husband ran out the door without out even kissing me. Ok come on yes I know it’s just the punctual kiss in the morning but I WANT my kiss. He wasn't mad at me. He just gave the kids hugs and kisses and forgot about me. He FORGOT his loving wife. And I called him on the cell phone and told him to come back and kiss me. He said OOPS!! What the heck is OOPS about? Come back and kiss me you idiot. So I'm kissless today.

I run around the house listening to Jason complaining because like normal I’m getting Faith ready.

Jason: “Mommy, I don’t want to watch this show!”
Me: “Jason, mommy put your cartoons on already.”
Jason: “But Mommy I don’t like this cartoon.”
Me: “I am getting Faith ready. I can’t help you right now.” Brain thinking just gives me time to get her on the bus and you can drive me insane.
Jason: “BUT MOMMY I DON”T WANT TO WATCH THIS SHOW!” (Yes he was screaming at the top of his lungs. Oh boy do I know what today is going to be like.)

I went back to trying to get Faith’s mop into a pony tail.

Faith: “Ow that hurts”
Me: “Let me cut your hair off please.”
Faith: “No mommy I want my hair to grow.”
Me: “But you can’t take care of it. It looks bad when it’s not put up.”
Faith: “Mom, I WANT MY HAIR LONG.”
Me: sigh

Walk Faith to the new bus stop. Our bus stop which simply translated means I freeze while she waits for the bus to come and then she runs down the street. I’m freezing. It’s not that cold so why am I freezing? Because I put on my husband’s robe which I now know has holes in the seat. There is simply nothing like having air rush up your butt.

I walk back into the house to find Jason tearing his sister’s diary up. Yes tearing. She’s going to kill him if I don’t today. I can tell.

Me: “Jason, you are not supposed to have Faith’s stuff.”
Jason: “Why not I don’t have one of these?”
Me: “Cuz you aren’t.”
Jason: “Well, Patsy would have let me have one.”

Ouchie! He used that word on me. Patsy is Jason’s former short term foster care mother. And when ever he is mad at me or isn’t getting his way, he uses that woman’s name. He so knows as well when he does it that it drives me insane.

I went downstairs in the laundry room thinking that it was safer for me there. YES I thought that doing laundry would make me peaceful lol. Jason follows me downstairs.

Jason: “Mommy, I don’t want to watch that show.”
Me: “I’m doing laundry.”
Jason: “Mommy, change the channel.”
Me: “Stop ordering me around you aren’t my boss.”
Jason: “Yes I am.”
Me: “Sit on that box right there and be quiet. Time out young man.”

I walk out of the laundry room into my bedroom. And then it starts.

Jason: “MOMMY YOU FORGOT ME.” Over and over and over he says it.

God, again, please give me patience.  If Monday starts like this, heaven help me for the rest of it.


Sunday, November 22, 2009

Crabby Old Man

This just came in my email.. I had to share.

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home in North Platte, Nebraska, it was believed that he had nothing left of any value.

Later, when the nurses were going through his meager possesions, they found this poem.  Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.  One nurse took her copy to Missouri.

The old man's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News Magazine of the St. Louis Association for Mental health.  A slide presentation has also been made based on his simple, but eloquent poem.

And this little old man, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this 'anonymous' poem winging across the Internet.

Crabby Old Man

What do you see nurses?   What do you see?
What are you thinking... when you're looking at me?
A crabby old man... not very wise,
Uncertain of habit...with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles his food...and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice...`I do wish you'd try!'
Who seems not to notice...the things that you do.
And forever is losing...A sock or shoe?

Who, resisting or not...lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding...the long day to fill?
Is that what you're that what you see?
Then open your eyes,'re not looking at me.

I'll tell you who I am...As I sit here so still,
As I do at your I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of Ten...with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters...who love one another.

A young boy of Sixteen...with wings on his feet.
Dreaming that soon now...a lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at heart gives a leap.
Remembering, the voices...that I promised to keep.

At Twenty-Five, now...I have young of my own.
Who need me to guide...And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty...My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other...With ties that should last.

At Forty, my young sons...have grown and are gone.
But my woman's beside see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, babies play 'round my knee.
Again, we know children...My loved one and me.

Dark days are upon wife is now dead.
I look at the future...shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing...young of their own.
And I think of the years...and the love that I've known.

I'm now an old man...and nature is cruel.
Tis jest to make old age...look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles...grace and vigor, depart.
There is now a stone...where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass...a young guy still dwells.
And now and battered heart swells.
I remember the joys...I remember the pain.
And I'm loving and over again.

I think of the years, all too few...gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact...that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, and see
Not a crabby old man...Look closer...see ME!!

Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within.  We will all, one day, be there, too!


I'm inviting You all to Thanksgiving


Your dinner will be the talk of the TOWN!!
You should try this!
Sure to bring smiles from your guests!
Here is a new way to prepare your Thanksgiving Turkey.

1. Cut out aluminum foil in desired shapes.
2. Arrange the turkey in the roasting pan, position the foil carefully. (see attached picture for details)
3. Roast according to your own recipe and serve.
4. Watch your guests' faces...

Morning Coffee.. Handing Out Lemonade and Awards

I've been so blessed to have such wonderful followers.  I follow so many of you in return if you make comments.  You'll see me bouncing into your blog making comments.  I answer you by email as well when I can.  I feel like I'm getting to know each and every one of you personally.  I love so many of you.  I've laughed at jokes or comments.  I have literally rolled out of my chair on a few.  I have cried when I've read some stories.  I've cried when I've posted a few of mine.  I've raged when you've raged.  I've screamed when you've screamed.  I felt your pain.  I felt your laughter.  I felt your joy.  I've felt blessed by each and every one of you.  LOL I've even shared some with my husband who now thinks most of us are nuts.  What do men know? 

But the point is... every time that I receive an award.. every time.. I feel like I'm being honored by a close friend.  By someone that I respect.  Nothing can be better than that.  Now it takes me a while to get these done because I do try to pick the right people.  I, also, try to never give the same award to someone twice which means new blogs get it.  Yes I do play by the rules.  But its because to me its so very special and my momma taught me to play by rules.  OHHH wait... maybe I'm trying to do that so I can tell my kids I do.  LOL   Ok I'm rambling..On to the awards.

I'd like to thank my lovely friend, Lynn at MiddayEscapades.  She's been a great friend to me.  Though every time I see the name of your blog I think Midday Escape.  I even caught myself typing that several times already.  She is always helping someone.  She posts great stories and advice.  I absolutely love her blog.  Thank you so much Lynn for the Lemonade Stand Award.

The rules are:

Now onward to the rules of this award:

- put the lemonade logo on your blog or within your post. (I've added it to my welcome page, too)
- nominate at least 10 blogs with great attitude or gratitude.
- link the nominees within your post.
- let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
- share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award.

I am pleased to pass on the Lemonade Award to the following 10 (in no particular order) who have given me great attitude and gratitude:

A Nut in a Nutshell
Frugal Mom Knows Best
Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes
If Evolution Works
Simply Me
Life of a Tater Tot Mom
I'm Living Proof that God has a sense of Humor
Stir Fry Awesomeness
Guessing All The Way

Please check them all out.  I love all of them.  They are awesome people and I'm sure that you will love them all.

I was surprised when I received the One Lovely Blog Award from Amy @ Crazy Little Thing Called Life.  I didn't realize that she was reading my blog.  I had just found her blog when I left for Florida.  Then never seem to catch up.  I love her blog.  Please check her out.  Thank you so much, Amy.  I truly appreciate it.  The rules for this award are:

The official rules of accepting this award are as follows:

- Accept this award and post it on your blog. Include link back to the blog you received it from.
- Pass the award to fifteen blogs you have newly discovered.
- Be sure to contact them to let them know they have been awarded.

I am passing on this award to:

All That and a Box of Rocks
Adventures of a Wannabe SupahMommy
Elastic Waistbands And Comfortable Shoes
Guessing All The Way
Mrs. Blogalot
Kristie's Notes
Ladybugs and Tonka Trucks
Life of a Tater Tot Mom
Over the Homespun Hedge
Savvy Moxie
So Many Kids So Little Time
The MamaZone
The Self Love Project
Welcome to Laurieville Population 1

I'd like to thank my friend, Nancy at IfEvolutionWorked for the I Love Your Blog Award.  I was so very honored.  I've been reading Nancy's blog for a long time now.  I absolutely love it and adore her.  Please be sure to check it out.  Thanks so much, Nancy, I appreciate this more than I can every express in words.   Now I'm not sure how I'm suppose to give this one out because Nancy did a little story for it.  I thought it was truly amazing.  So I am going to give this to the blogs that I have been reading for a while that I think are truly outstanding.  They are:

A Nut In a Nut Shell
A Woman's Life Stages
Deal'ightfully Frugal
Domestically Challenged
Frugal Mom Knows Best
Guessing All The Way
Headaches, Hormones, and Hot Flashes
Heart 2 Heart
If Evolution Really Worked (yes I know you gave it to me.  I'm sharing it.)
I'm Living Proof That God Has a Sense of Humor
Just Breathe
Keeping Up with the Schultz
Mama's Losin It
Mamahood, Among Other Things
Menopausal New Mom
Midday Escapades
My Messy Paradise
One Cluttered Brain
Pajamas and Coffee
Patiently Waiting
Stir-Fry Awesomeness
The Suburban Jungle

Two Peas in a Pod
Welcome to Laurieville Population 1
Yonca is Cooking

Now I really think that you should check them all out.  They are awesome all of my winners are.  Congratulations to all the winners.  Again thank you April, Nancy & Lynn.  I really appreciate it.  If I forgot someone, it was not my intention to do so.


Saturday, November 21, 2009

Gripes about Foster Care NOT helping

Ok my budget just got shot to heck and back.  My furnace stopped working last night.  We had a service man out.  He told us that it could run anywhere between $3,000 to $5,000.  Yikes!!  I thought I was finally getting a handle on things and wham!!  This totally stinks!

I'm going nuts. It's the one thing that I need to be able to afford but can't.  So I touch on the fact that I'm at home with the kids.  My husband makes good money but it puts me in the middle class.  Well ok.  You all know what I think about the middle class.  I think its non-existence.  We simply are stuck sometimes.  I was making such great money before Jason came.  Don't get me wrong.  I do NOT nor will I ever regret getting Jason.  It's just that we could afford so much more.  And yes, I let the bills run up.  We could afford it.  We were going somewhere.

Jason came.  I had to quit my job.  Now here's the interesting part, we chose to go after Jason.  We would do it again.  But we both EXPECTED that since he was in foster care that we would get help from the state.  That's not how it was at all.  Jason is related to my seven year old daughter, Faith.  So it's a relation adoption.  Which means the state does not help out at all.  They don't give you any financial help at all.  They don't give you daycare expenses.  He was coming from another foster care provider who got daycare expenses.  They don't give you any kind of financial support at all.  We were lucky to get a medical card on him before we adopted him.  So basically the state used us for babysitting while he was still a WARD of the STATE's.  He wasn't even ours for a year while he was here.  We couldn't claim him on our taxes either this year because he had to be with us for six months.  Technically he was with us from the end of July.  Basically foster care screwed us.  I couldn't work anymore because Jason required that extra time.  I couldn't put him in daycare because I didn't have the money to do so.  And the state would NOT help.  I asked for help and they turned me down when technically he was LEGALLY theirs.

Ok so here is the my actual complaint.  My husband and I are NOT related to Jason at this point.  My seven year old daughter was.  So where was she suppose to get the money to support him??  He was a WARD of the court.  We had to live by their rules yet we had to pay for it.  Where are all the families that go after their relative's children who went into foster care for some ungodly reason going to get the money to support the child?  Is foster care letting us down as a nation? I have to save YES.  

Again we would still have adopted him no matter what but I wanted to finally say something.


Friday, November 20, 2009

A Single Moment in Time

I'm going to join Mama's Losin It in her writer's workshop this week.  Yes it was Thursday but I still felt like writing this.  In the workshop, she wanted us to share a journal entry from when we were 13 years old.  Well I don't have the journal but I can remember it clearly.  I can remember my thoughts and how I felt.

I was sitting on the desk talking with my friend, Cathy, when he walked up to me. I was 14 years old. I wasn't a slim teenager but I was a buxom one. Michael walked up to me and asked me if I had seen the soccer game yesterday. I said, "Yes". He asked what I thought. Did I think they could have done better?

I remembered thinking. Why is he asking me these questions? Why is he talking to me? I'm 14 years old. He's 18 years old for goodness sakes. He's hot and I'm plain. I'm a plain Jane with teeth that need braces but I know I won't get them. I'm wearing a dumpy shirt and jeans. I'm nothing spectacular. He is. He could have any girl he wanted. At least that’s what I thought.

We continued talking. He asked if I wanted to go for a walk. WOW me go for a walk with him. What does he want? Will he kiss me? We went walking through the park. He reached for my hand and brought it to his lips. I was a goner. The second he touched my hand, my heart began to pound heavily. My brain went to mush.

Again the questions came, why is he talking to me? Why me of all people? From the day forward, we were inseparable. He was very patient with me. He was careful about not crossing lines. We were best friends. I could share anything I wanted with him. We talked about how the kids treated me in school. We talked about my studies. We talked about his work as a mechanic. We talked and talked and talked.

One day, he got really mad and he left. I didn't understand. When he came back, he apologized for being mad but now I wanted to know why. He said that he was older than me and sometimes it was simply so hard to wait for me to grow up. Honestly I had no clue what he was talking about. I was soon to find out though. He told me that he had always wanted me. That it was hard to just be friends. We decided to take our relationship to a deeper level. I was 16 now and we had to discuss it with my parents. He was 20. My parents weren't happy about it but they let us be.

How could I have known that moment that he touched my hands when I was 14 years old that my heart would be gone? That I would love him so much that I would give up all to take care of him? How was I supposed to even know that one day I would marry him?

I did marry him when I turned 18 years old on my sister’s birthday. We loved each other more than any other. We talked about everything and nothing. I learned so much about him. And then his illness took over. He lost his eyesight a month after we got married. He had to quit working. I had to go to work full time to support us. I did it with joy. I walked away from a four year scholarship to take care of the man that I loved.

He taught me that life was about living. He knew that he was living on borrowed time. I was so young I didn’t believe something could take him from me. He lost his kidneys to the disease shortly after losing his eyesight. For years I watched him suffer without telling anyone. Without showing how much it hurt to others. He would ask how another was and not mention how he was. I was the only one who knew how much pain he was in. He never hid anything from me. He told me that honesty was the most important trait to someone you love. He told me that he would never hide anything. And he told me that he wanted me to live a full and happy life after he died. The day he told me that I ran. I just took off running. I left him at home knowing he would be ok. I didn’t want to accept that he would leave me one day.

I miss him still.

Ok enough of that… remember he taught me to live my life to the fullest. What I’m going to ask you all is that you hug your loved one tight and love them. Cherish them.


Thursday, November 19, 2009

Saint Nicholas

When I got engaged, I decided to convert to a Catholic so that my children would not be confused about their religions. I have now found out that my hubsand is confused about his religion anyway. Even though, he has been a Catholic all of his life. He did not know what the meaning of St Nick night was. All he could tell me was that his mother would fill his stocking as a child on December 6th and say that St. Nick had been. As he got older, his mother would give them a gift before. Usually this gift was something that they needed such as a pair of shoes or new coat.

Now, I can understand why she gave the gift because as the winter comes we do need winter stuff. But I was not satisfied this year, I know that in the future my kids are going to want to know what exactly it means. We can not afford to send them to Catholic school.

As I am shopping last year for the stocking supplies, I ran into this delightful woman who started up a conversation with me about Saint Nick. I asked her if she knew what exactly we are celebrating to which she told me no it was just something they always did. As we were talking about, we were interrupted by another lady who wanted to know if we knew the meaning. She didn't either. She had converted and her husband couldn't tell her. Not only that her daughter was now asking "Isn't Saint Nick...Santa Claus?" So its official I knew my kids would ask.

At this point, an older lady told us that Saint Nick was a celebrating of something that we wouldn't do if we knew the truth. She said there was this town that was pretty much broke and that they did not have any food. So this man took three children and cooked them. He then gave this food to the town and they made him a Saint for saving his town.

Now I was hoping that this woman was wrong because I won't be celebrating such an awful thing. I came home and told Kenny about it. He told me that he doesn't think that’s true. So I did some research and here is a synopsis of what I found:

Nicholas was brought up extremely well by his parents. His parents passed away when he was very young. It was his determination to devote his inheritance to works of charity. The first of which was when he found out that a citizen had lost all of his money. This man was going to have to have his three daughters who could not find a husband because they did not have a dowry go into prostitution. When Nicholas found out he threw a bag of gold into the house. The first daughter was married off shortly after because she now had a dowry. Nicholas then followed suit with the other girls until they were married. Now the father did find out who it was and overwhelmed him with his gratitude.

There was a picture on the three purses which came to be mistaken for the heads of three children and so this gave is what the old lady was talking about. These children were not killed by Saint Nicholas but by an innkeeper that she spoke of.

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