Thursday, August 27, 2009

Mommy, Where are My Baby Pictures?

A simple question for most mothers but for me it’s a hard question when you have adopted an older child. Yes, we got Jason when he was 3 years old. But when I'm showing Faith her baby pictures, I don't have his. The look on his face killed me. He looked like I had punched him in the stomached. The county was supposed to give us a memory book since he was in foster care from 3 months old until we got him. We have nothing from him. Yes, we have pictures of him from when he was with us. He wants to see pictures of himself as a baby. He wants to see me holding him as a baby. He doesn't remember everything even now. He remembers a lot though. I hugged him close and told him that we love him. We talked again about how he is in our family because we love him. You see that’s the reason for the name of the website. My family is made from our hearts. One of the problems with adopting an older child is the connection that needs to be built. Oh, we love him and he loves us. But it took time to have that happen.

Can you imagine what it feels like to wonder why you aren't with your biological parents? Will I ever be able to fully explain that? No, I don't think so. All I can do is keep telling him how much we love him. Tell him that we are the most fortunate people in the world because we found him. Some day he will understand but how much can I expect a four year old to understand.

If anyone has an idea of how to make him comfortable about lack of pictures please leave me a comment.


Amanda said...

Bless his heart! Gosh, I don't have any good ideas for you. Maybe he and you can go through some baby magazines and cut out pictures of what you think he may have looked like (based on his looks now) and let him make a scrapbook that way.

Veronica Lee said...

Hi! I'm visiting from MBC. Great blog.

Mommy said...

Amanda, Hi there! I'm trying to contact his biological grandma now to see if I can get any kind of pictures. I, also, called children services to try and get that book again. I can't imagine not having one. I thought about substituing one of Faith's as his. I like your idea though.

Vernoica Lee, Hi there! Thank you so much. Enjoy your stay.